I got my first coffee maker last week, a birthday present from Jef. It’s pretty awesome, it has all kinds of knobs and switches (isn’t that what you look for in a coffee maker?). Actually, he did a lot of research and, fancy buttons aside, it got great reviews on Amazon. I don’t mind admitting this is my first coffee maker, what’s embarrassing is that I didn’t exactly know how traditional coffee makers worked until now. I worked in a coffee shop for a short time in high school, but industrial coffee makers and espresso machines are different. After we read the manual, my sister went upstairs to get ready and left me to make the first pot.

*stares at the machine*

Open the lid. Immediately pour water into the wrong hole. It was clear, because it didn’t drain, and I knew that’s where the grounds went, and they couldn’t go there if the it was full of water. So I picked the whole thing up and turned it upside down over the sink. Let’s try again. I noticed a hole marked with numbers, and hoped it related to cups of water. Add water, nothing bad happened. Add grounds, close lid. Push button. Turn knob. Flip switch.

Viola!

The first few pots were drinkable, but not very good. We made a few more and finally settled on slightly less than one tablespoon of grounds per cup of coffee, because this coffee-maker considers one cup 5-oz instead of 8 (weird). The standard one-to-one ratio will be limited to all-nighters or holy-hangover days. Or those days when Jef makes coffee.