Jef found Lucy and Nori huddled together in the living room last night, very intent on a tiny object on the carpet. They’d found a baby lizard and apparently already played with it to death. Jef threw the poor thing outside and came to tell me about it.

K: Awwww. Poor little thing. Wash your hands.
J: Why?
K: Lizard diseases.
J: Lizard diseases. (looks at his hands.)
K: Yes.
J: *waves hands in my face*
K: BABY. Wash your hands! Lizard diseases! LIZARD. DISEASES.
J: I’ll give you $100 if you can name ONE lizard disease.
K: …
K: Salmonella.
J: Because the baby lizard was out playing w/ raw chicken?
K: I don’t know. I just know that when you play w/ lizards, you have to wash your hands. It would be sad if you died.

Later. After he’d washed his hands.

K: Sometimes I think it’s sad that my life partner doesn’t understand germs.
J: Sometimes I think it’s sad that mine doesn’t either.